Monday, June 27, 2011

A late prelude...

I enjoy writing my blogs. For me, it is an outlet, an escape for my world that at this point consists of feeding children, changing diapers, feeding children, cleaning up spills, mediating arguments, feeding children, disciplining, and maybe, just maybe, getting more than a 4 hour stretch of sleep. It is the stage of life that I am in. It is chaos, but a lovely chaos that I wouldn't trade for anything. Yet even the best of moms (and dads) need a retreat to another world. For me, that world consists of me, my thoughts, and my computer. Most of the time, I hear from people who are in the same stage of life and relate to what I have to say. They read these entries as snapshots into my world. I write about the drama but there is more that happens in my world that I don't share. People who read my blogs and don't relate or aren't impressed, just don't comment or they stop reading. But sometimes, they do comment, and perhaps should. One of my  readers noted that I don't seem to think highly of Dave based on my writings. I was completely caught off guard. I went back and reread my entries. Do I sound slightly egocentric? Perhaps, but it is my blog! Of course it's about me! But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that she was could have a point. In reality, I think the world of my spouse and he does more than I could ever put down in a blog. I should also add that I have been here at my parents for two weeks without him, so if absence doesn't make the heart grow fonder, it may just make the blogger more appreciative of what she has. First of all, it takes an incredibly strong man to be married to me. I am strong-willed and stubborn. My mom says that Hanna takes after me and truth be told, I think she is right. I get an idea in my head and run with it. So we can add impulsive to the list. I am controlling and a perfectionist. Dave and I have painted dozens of rooms, and even though the room appears perfect, he will put on a second coat or touch up spots that he can't even see because I claim it is uneven. He cuts the grass more often than necessary because I THINK it is too long. He buys crickets every week for a gecko he doesn't even like and does all the errands and grocery shopping sometimes with one or two kids in tow. Silas is now almost nine months old, and that will mean that for the past nine months, Dave has gotten out of bed at 4 a.m. when Silas gets up to bring him to me in bed to nurse him. The fact that Silas STILL gets up at 4 a.m. is the subject for another blog. Dave separates (this is key) and does laundry, feeds children, takes out the garbage (I can count the number of times I've done that on one hand), and puts up with me. He is a wonderful spouse and if I gave off the impression that I don't think he is intelligent, loving, capable, and all around, a terrific guy, I apologize. The humor in my blog is never intended to be at his expense. There are two sides to every story and what you read here is mine; my feelings and thoughts, sometimes rational, sometimes not. I love Dave and if you don't know that he is great guy, take my word, or words, for it... he is:). I am not one for mushy and sappy blogs and while I don't feel like my blogs were spiteful and mean towards Dave, if one person took that away from it, it is enough to make me want to address it. Dave and I laugh with and at each other at times. In our stage of life, sometimes it is all we can do to get through the day or night. So laugh with Dave and I, and laugh at me... I have voluntarily brought that upon myself while he, unfortunately, gets thrown in by default. Yet, he is secure and confident enough to allow me to blog my mind and just shake his head when I exaggerate or blow things out of proportion (reinsert line on "two sides to every story" here). So keep in mind that no matter what you read, I do indeed feel fortunate to have Dave along on this journey of life. I'd rather pack a thousand trips than go on one without him... exaggeration, of course, but you get the point!

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